Our Social Networking Strategy or Fishing for Friends

When we moved to Carbondale, my husband knew approximately five people here: the guy who sold us our house, our banker, and a couple of colleagues whom he'd met during his interviewing process. I knew precisely no one. Being pregnant during the job search and subsequent house hunt left me high and dry in Boston while he flew around the country scoping out potential universities, then neighborhoods, then houses. Thanks to photographs and a thorough inspection by my in-laws, I felt comfortable signing the papers to buy our first home sight-unseen.

Grant warned me before we moved that I would have to make a concerted effort to make friends in this new town or risk being perpetually bored and frustrated at home with a new baby. Since I am well aware of my own chronic case of cabin fever, I was eager to get out and about and seduce unsuspecting residents of C-Dale into our fledgling social network.

I expected it to be time-consuming and difficult. I work from home now (amazing what you can do with a cell phone, a high-powered computer, and a fast internet connection) so I don't have a cadre of publishing co-workers to chat it up with. I have a new baby so I don't have the time (nor the need) to attend a gym or yoga studio. I'm not religious so we didn't have the welcome wagon of insta-friends that come with a church/synagogue/mosque membership.

Little did I know, however, that I was already a member of the most well-connected and outgoing group in this town: the association of NEW MOMS who recently moved here and are desperate for adult interaction. I met Susan taking my daughter for a walk (she accosted me on the sidewalk when she saw me pushing a stroller in front of her house); I met Tracy at the farmer's market (acknowledging that we have the same Chariot stroller); I met Karen and Heidi at Baby Talk and Stacy at La Leche League; I met Sheila at a Sufi preschool fundraiser; I met Meg and Brigette at the mom's group Sheila and I co-founded; I met Wendy (through Karen) at Klassics for Kids; I met Terry at Longbranch Coffeehouse (asking how old our daughter is and mentioning that she has a kiddo approximately the same age); I met Bethany at Wiggles 'n' Tunes and Lori and Kathy at Parent Connection. Maria, who lives across the street and is now our daycare provider, I made a point to meet because she has a son the same age as my daughter.

Lucky for us, this town has an amazing variety of groups and activities for families and children. By trying to socialize my daughter, I've socialized myself. Forget the long, arduous task of courting new friends, this has become our social networking strategy: we send our daughter out into the world and see what she brings back. So far, they've all been keepers.

—Amy